maggie

The back of the couch is not a bed, apparently

Okay so. The back of the couch. It’s the best spot in the house: soft, high up, and it comes with a navy blanket. Everyone knows this.

Bailey knows this too, which is the problem. In this video he’s already up there, lying flat along the whole thing like he paid for it. Legs out. Eyes half closed. Not a care in the world.

Now, I could have gone and found my own spot. But I had a better idea. If Bailey is lying on the best spot, and I sit on Bailey, then technically I am on the best spot. And I’m higher up than him. That’s just maths.

So I went for it. I stood over him, lined myself up, and very carefully, very politely, tried to lower my bottom onto my brother.

There is not a lot of room on the back of a couch when one of the spots is already a whole Bailey. There was some shuffling. There was some balancing. There was a moment where I had to have a serious think about where all four of my legs were.

It was close. I’m just going to say that. It was so close.

Bailey, for the record, stayed lying down the whole time. I’m choosing to believe this means he was happy to be my cushion, and not that he was ignoring me on purpose.

Tonight on the couch with Mum I’m trying again. She’s softer anyway.